Momma, Ninja warrior

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It’s that time of day again, whether it’s nap time or bedtime, you’ve seen the signs and now your baby needs sleep otherwise it’s Crankyville population: you and little mister.
As you rock him gently, making sure he’s been generously fed, burped and has a clean bum, you lay him in to bed with much resistance like you’re putting him down forever!
His face starts with the quivering of the lip, then the redness and soon after he’s in full on tears. That is until the dummy hits his mouth and Ollie the Owl starts whirring away as you try to console the little one that you aren’t going anywhere.

Sometimes his eyes close completely, sometimes he peaks at you for a few minutes and then closes them as soon as you look away and other times he full on stares at you awaiting a story, either from a book or even just the sound of your voice.
Once his tiny eyes have closed you wait around to make sure he’s fully asleep which takes even longer when you add in the amount of times the dummy falls out and he jolts himself awake, throwing his hands up and legs out. After this has happened a few times you eventually resort to swaddling him up like a little hot dog.
Now’s your chance! You can slowly sneak away! You never quite know how loud your house is until you have a sleeping baby.
As you slowly start to rise the bed creaks and you suddenly stop and stare at him, hoping to God it doesn’t startle him. You’re just about to have another go when the bloody white noise owl stops whirring and awaits a noise to get it going again. Thankfully when it starts again from a squeak of the bed it doesn’t make him jump.
You’ve finally made it off the bed after a good ten minutes of slowly sliding down it on your belly trying all your might not to make any noise.

Step one and you hear an almighty creak from the awful floorboards which, after doing this four or five times a day you’d think you’d remember which part of the floor to step on but no… another creak and you wince at the sound. You look back at the sleeping child in his cot and his eyes are still closed. This time the noise comes from your ridiculously loud joints cracking, oh crap! His eyes shoot open and after a quick dart around for any signs of danger and to check mummy is still in the area, they slowly close once more.
When you finally make it to the stairs, and looking back once more at the sleeping angel, you bolt down then faster (but quieter) than when your mum used to shout ‘dinner’s ready’. Hoping that moving quickly will short-live any noise that is about to happen.

You check the baby monitor and he’s still asleep! You rejoice in the fact that you have completed your ninja training and leap to the coffee machine full of hope, awaiting that much needed caffeine. The few times you actually get to yourself you rush through your chores just in case he only catnaps then stand there staring at the monitor, but more often then not he awakens before you’ve even added the sugar to your coffee, sometimes it all depends on the day.

Leave your ninja stories in the comments below!

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